What would our swimsuits say if they could talk?

In a moment of Friday frivolity here at Curvy HQ, we found ourselves wondering “What would our swimsuits tell us if they could talk?” Hilarity, and a little inappropriateness ensued, as we envisaged our swimwear chatting away to one another on holidays.

With no other pressing engagements to occupy our time, we decided to compile a list of our best-selling swimsuits and imagined what their personality traits would be. Not to be confused with the wearer’s personality, this is all about the swimsuit. Obviously.

So, let us set the scene. Five women are lounging by the resort pool and we’re like the Doctor Dolittle of swimwear, eavesdropping on the conversation being had by their bathers. In the name of entertainment, stay with us. Please.

• Frill Sleeve
• 3 Tier 
• Twist Front Bandeau
• Double Frill Bikini
• Wide Strap Swim Dress

Frill Sleeve

I always end up in the centre of the group. Everyone just seems to want to sit next to me. I guess I've always been popular without really trying, so I'll just have accept it. 

I would describe myself as an introverted extrovert. I don’t look for attention, but I get it regardless. While I appear humble and nonchalant, I secretly love it.

I usually keep myself zipped up and closed off to the world, but my friends, and a few select admirers, get to see me exposed when I crave a little attention. It’s not for long though, as I don’t need approval from others, but a little ego boost never hurt anyone.

My favourite emoji is the wink face and always sign off my messages with an X and my initial. My friends call me “iconic”, and I just laugh it off.

Leopard Frill Sleeve One Piece

3 Tier

“Well behaved swimsuits rarely make history.” These are the words I live by. The sign says, “no diving”, but I just want to run up and do a massive bomb dive. I’m torn between wanting to break the rules and being considerate and respectful to those around me.

I’m always on the guest list and rarely have to buy my own drinks. I guess you could say I’m the life of the party, but I also value my “me time”. I have a new obsession with floatation tanks and love to escape into my own blissful imagination.

While I have an abundance of followers and acquaintances, I prefer to spend time with my small close-knit group, lazing by the pool, chatting away.

Santorini Blue 3 Tier One Piece

Twist Front Bandeau

Yes, I’m a control freak. No, I’m not uptight. I just like things the way I like them. No one would know this about me, though. I prefer to look like I’m living on the edge, but I leave nothing to chance.

I manage my expectations by being meticulously organised and plan everything I do to get the outcome I desire. This is just for me, though, and I never transfer my ambition onto others. In fact, I love being around spontaneous and frivolous people who make my head spin with their flighty ways.  

I give the impression that I’m a daring risk-taker, but I know exactly what I’m doing and would never put myself in a situation I didn’t want to be in. I’m an expert at saying “no”, and my friends say they’re envious of this superpower. For my close group, I’m a supportive friend and give hugs freely.

Positano White Twist Front Bandeau One Piece

Double Frill Bikini

I’m a people pleaser. I’m happy if you’re happy. My friends worry that I’m a push over or worse, a doormat, but I prefer to live a calm and peaceful existence, avoiding conflict whenever it rears its head. It’s not that I don’t care, on the contrary, I care deeply. I just channel my fight energy into things I feel passionate about.

I’m always invited on girls’ trips and often requested to share a room because of my low maintenance, easy going attitude. While I keep it relatively chill, I am prone to a little first night fever as my excitement gets the better of me. I just love being with my group and feel 100% comfortable in the presence of my nearest and dearest.

I attract like minded people and have a friends list a mile long. I get endless kind messages on my birthday and reply to every single one.

Double Frill Bikini Top and High Waist Pant

Wide Strap Swim Dress

I’m the mum of the group. If you’re in trouble and I’m present, I’ve got your back. While I’m prepared for anything and ready to jump in when disaster strikes, I am certainly not boring. I’m here to have fun and will say “yes” to almost anything. If there’s an adventure to be had, I’m joining in.

I have a work hard, play hard, relax hard attitude. I love to be pampered and know I deserve it. While I’m here to help, I also know my worth and have learnt how to make myself a priority without disadvantaging the people I love. “You can’t fill from an empty cup!”

While I might not always make a fabulous first impression, once you get to know me, we’ll be friends forever. Having said that, I’ll only accept a friend request if we are friends in real life. Soz.

Molokai Wide Strap Swim Dress